Story of a Bird

I tried to save a bird today. Yet like I always say, "You can bring a horse to the river, but you can't make the horse drink the water." I tried to save the bird, but the bird refused my help.

I was walking back to the office with a brunch of colleagues after lunch, talking, chatting, joking, laughing. In a distance, I saw some movement on the grass patch in front. I went over to take a closer look. It was a bird fallen off the trees, with broken legs. It couldn't stand up so it couldn't leap off the ground and fly. It was struggling so hard to fly away. But it couldn't. I wanted to pick up, bring it back and nurse it. But the poor bird is struggling in between a fence of a construction side. It fumbled into the construction side, which is out of my reach.

A few colleagues came over and see what I was doing. We stayed there for more than 15 minutes, hoping that the bird can come out of the fence so we can help it. But the bird, not knowing our kindness, went further and further away from the fence. So far that we have to say "I have tried to save you, but you didn't want our help."

After office hour, as we passed by the area on our way home, we saw the bird drown in the puddle of water within the construction area. If only it allow us to come closer.

Morale of the story? Perhaps sometimes others wanted to help you, but you take their kindness as evil and run away. They tried, but you refused their offer.

Goodbye My Lover by James Blunt

Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) ~ Baz Luhrmann

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Ladies and Gentlemen, of the class of ’99
Wear… sunscreen

If I could offer you only one tip for the future,
Sunscreen would be..
It….

The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists
Whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
Than my own meandering experience…

I will dispense this advice now…

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth;
Oh nevermind;
You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me,
In 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself
And recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you
And how fabulous you really looked….
You’re not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future;
Or worry, but know that worrying
Is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you

Sing…

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts,
Don’t put up with
People who are reckless with yours.

Floss…

Don’t waste your time on jealousy;
Sometimes you’re ahead,
Sometimes you’re behind…

The race is long,
And in the end,
It’s only with yourself.

Remember the compliments you receive,
Forget the insults;
If you succeed in doing this,
Tell me how.

Keep your old love letters,
Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch…

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life…
The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22
What they wanted to do with their lives,
Some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees,
You’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t,
Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t,
Maybe you’ll divorce at 40,
Maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…
What ever you do,
Don’t congratulate yourself too much
Or berate yourself either
– Your choices are half chance,
So are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body,
Use it every way you can…
Don’t be afraid of it,
Or what other people think of it,
It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own..

Dance…

Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions,
Even if you don’t follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines,
They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents,
You never know when they’ll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings;
They are the best link to your past and
The people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go,
But for the precious few you should hold on.
Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle
Because the older you get,
The more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once,
But leave before it makes you hard;
Live in Northern California once,
But leave before it makes you soft.

Travel…

Accept certain inalienable truths,
Prices will rise,
Politicians will philander,
You too will get old,
And when you do
You’ll fantasize that when you were young
Prices were reasonable,
Politicians were noble
And children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you.

Maybe you have a trust fund,
Maybe you have a wealthy spouse;
But you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair,
Or by the time you're 40,
It will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy,
But,
Be patient with those who supply it.

Advice
Is a form of nostalgia,
Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal,
Wiping it off,
Painting over the ugly parts
And recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me
On the sunscreen…

How pathetic Man became

Random Thoughts

I had some rough years the last few years back. Looking back at then, I didn't know how did I manage to survive. But I did. Maybe it was God who carried me through. I am pretty glad that the rough times are over. As like after every storm, there are much to clean up. I took a long break to help me put things back into perspective. Time did help me to put my circumstances into life experiences. Looking back, I realised I grew from those.

I am generally happier these days, happier than I was the few years of my time, even though I am beginning my life from scratch again. It does get lonely at times. I did meet new people, but I rarely find those with "friend" material. It is the Chinese New Year season, and the ever-popular question about marriage is often heard nowadays. I don't think I am trying to meet anyone new or looking for anyone at this stage. I don't think I will get attach anytime soon. I just want to find my career path, look for a meaning in my life and the reason why I am here. I want to spend all my time and energy doing just that, the purpose of my life.

I realised I became more relational this year, exactly my new year resolution for 2009. I realised when I try to be excellent, I compromised feelings and became cold like a robot. But when I try not to be excellent all the time, I began to realise the world is kinder and I feel more like a person. Maybe Jerb was prophetic 6 years ago when she tell me "Excellence without Love is nothing".

Maybe all the unrealistic datelines and goals I have set for myself changed me into a task orientated monster. Maybe I need to learn how to relax.

Chaos in order

A friend of mine... Correction.. A fellow quekielities told me that he has been reading my blog and he find them rather depressing. Friend E said that she sees hope in the midst of my writings.

I do not deny or try to hide my agony. There are struggles I am facing. In fact, trapped in between. Feeling trapped is feeling helpless. Feeling that there is nothing you can do about your situation. The lost of control of a situation can cause us to panic and worry. Excessive worry leads to depression.

I know of a God who gives and takes away, who sometimes allow bad things to happen to good people to teach them how to be in control during chaos by trusting a infallible character.

You may think "That's siimple.." It is not.. Only when the rubber meets the road will true character finally show.

I was trapped. I had my story to tell. Trapped in my own mind I was. Sometimes it is difficult to see that we have choices. Sometimes we feel we are trapped by circumstances or by the previous choices that we have made that have led us to where we are now.

But we failed to see past a closed door with an open window. There is a beginning at every ending; a head at every tail; a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. There is life after death.

Life itself has its own balance. God almightly who created the heaven and earth installed the balance. The Chinese called it the "Yin" and the "Yang". The ancient Chinese understanding of how things work, how seemingly disjunct or opposing forces are interconnected and interdependent in the natural world, giving rise to each other in turn.

The balance of order for centuries of centuries kept earth rotating at its course. An order in every chaos. In the beginning of time a balance was set. Heaven and earth was created; light and darkness was separated; day and night was invented; water from water was separated.

My feelings at this moment

I fell sick today, very ill. It inspired several thoughts within me. I felt cold when I was shivering, not the physical "cold", but emotionally. I was on my bed the whole day today. There I was thinking, how I wished there was someone here with me.

Maybe there is a void in my heart that need some filling in. Maybe man are not made to be alone. I do not know why. All I know is, me, I miss the idea of having someone. Someone who will be there when I need her. Someone who will encourage me when I am discourage. Someone who will give me a towel when I needed it.

Just as this post is titled, I am sharing my feelings. I missed loving and being loved and having that special someone around. I miss having someone to share my joy and my pain with. I miss a lot of things...

Yes. This flu is messing with my mind as well... I better sign off here... Tata...

Marry Me